Publisher: Cemetery Dance Publications
Publication Date: 30th June 2015
Pages: 94
MY REVIEW:
A collection
of short stories from James Newman.
I really
didn’t want to read this just yet as the only copy I have is my personally
signed one from James and I didn’t want to scuff or damage it. It has just been released on ebook though so now all you lucky people can get to read it too! The temptation got too much though and I just had to don my
white gloves and sit in the specially controlled room to read it.
The foreword
in this book is written by Jeff Strand. It’s quite possibly the best, funniest
thing I have read in ages. Anyway, on with the stories.
THE
HONEST-TO-GOD TRUE STORY OF EARL P. AND A BUG CALLED ABRAHAM LINCOLN or A MAN
AND HIS PET FLY:
Earl wakes
up when a fly buzzes in his ear. He shoos it away. He can’t believe what he is
seeing or hearing when the fly starts to talk to him. The fly asks him to do a
favour for him. It involves murder and Earl doesn’t seem to have a choice.
This is mad.
You would think a story with a talking fly would have you thinking WTF? It
works though. It’s punchy and funny. It’s very very creepy and it has a twist
at the end that makes Earl cry, and you just stare at the page in disbelief.
★★★★★
THE GOOD, THE BAD, AND THE SEVERELY MALADJUSTED:
John Henry
Mason never lost a fight. When he gets jumped at a creek by an “Injun”, he aims
to keep that record going.
This starts
as a good old cowboy v’s injun western short that will take you back to the
lazy Saturday afternoons sitting watching Mr Wayne on the telly. With a bitter
twist at the end it turns into a disturbing modern day tale of murder and viciousness.
★★★★★ for
the twist.
YOUR COLD,
BLACK HEART:
He knows she
is cheating on him. It’s come to a head. There are knives involved.
This is a
short “flash fiction” piece with a hell of a brutal twist at the end. This was
also made into a short film by Kevin Woods which is fantastic. It totally gives
you the creepy, eerie feeling that James was trying to get across in the story.
You can watch the short film here: You Tube.
★★★★★ for being able to produce something so creepy in so little words.
THE
TELL-TALE FART (A PARODY):
A man gets
very angry at his neighbours constant farting. He can stand the noise or the
stench no longer and decides his only course of action is to kill him.
Written in
the style of Poe, I really have no idea what I just read!?
★★★ weird
ones.
BLESS THIS
MEAL, OH LORD:
Flash
fiction. Can’t say anymore. Oh……don’t read whilst eating.
★★★★★
SUFFER THE
CHILDREN:
A story told
in the form of diary entries by a woman about her general everyday life with
her husband. All is going well until her husband sponsors a child in Ethiopia.
Is he obsessing over the child or is she slowly going nuts?
I found this
story very disturbing. I won’t say why but I felt very very dirty afterwards.
It’s a bit sickening to read but on the other hand you can’t not. Brilliant
writing again.
★★★★★
KEEPING UP
WITH THE JONESES:
The Joneses
have everything. Their neighbours must keep up, getting bigger and better with
everything they copy. Will they copy death?
Another
flash fiction and I absolutely loved this one. Horror without the monsters or
jumps.
★★★★★
A TOWN
CALLED HATRED:
Merrick is a
travelling salesman, selling bibles. Well, he uses that as a front. He is on a
road trip, never staying too long in one place. He is actually a serial killer
and even has a body on his back seat right now. He passes a sign for a town
called Hatred that doesn’t appear on any map, and decides to visit. Hatred is a
town from hell, but for someone like Merrick it could turn out to be his
Utopia.
This is
wonderful. It’s brutal. It paints a horrifying and harrowing picture of both
Merrick and Hatred. Mr Newman’s evil and sadistic side comes out in this story with
disturbing force.
★★★★★
HOLY
ROLLERS:
Jack is
running late for work. At 8.29 AM there is a knock at the door. When he answers
it, Jack is confronted by two gentlemen asking if they can speak to him about
Jesus. Jack tries his best to get rid of them but his wife Mary is trying to
convince him to speak with them. Next thing he knows, Jack is tied to a chair
while Mary is likewise trussed up. What happens next is a total nightmare for
Jack and Mary as the “brothers” try to get him to repent.
This novella
is the best story in the book for me. It starts like any other annoying visit
from these religious nuts but quickly transcends into something much more horrifying
with a twist that had me shouting “aw FFS!”. The tension, terror and mental and
physical horror in this story is immense.
★★★★★
So there you
have it. A collection of short stories by Mr James Newman. As Jeff Strand
points out in the foreword, this collection is very far removed from any of James’s
other novels I have read. If someone handed you one of the stories to read
without knowing anything about it, you may have difficulty recognising the
style as Newman’s.
They are
horror. They are full of psychological head feck. They are disturbing and
harrowing at times. They are funny at times. The one thing they have in common
with the Newman novels you will be familiar with is that the writing is superb.
Whether it be a novella length story or one page, you cannot escape the story.
You get dragged into it and you will not get out again until the story is
finished. A lot of the time you don’t want it to finish either.
At the start
of each story James has a little narrative to tell you more about the story and
how it came to be. I hope he doesn’t mind but I want to quote a section from one
of these:
“I call it
“Middle-American, white “picket” fence horror. I find myself writing about
these themes more and more these days – tales not populated with zombies or
werewolves or vampires, but with normal people. People we see every day. People
who are sometimes capable of terrible things…….”
This describes
his writing to a tee. Grab some of his novels and you will discover this. It’s
relatively easy to make a horror novel scary when someone is being chased by a
monster or an axe wielding mad man. It’s not so easy to take everyday
situations and turn them about so that you dread them and the horrors they can
bring. James Newman is a master at this. He could probably scare me writing
about opening a fridge. He is that good.
The ratings are the highest possible. It couldn’t get any less.
General rating:
★★★★★ Absolutely loved it and highly recommended it.
Horror rating:
★★★★★ I need a change of pants.
This book has just been released on ebook. Grab your copy NOW! Be sure to check out Mr Newman’s other works including Animosity, Ugly
as Sin and The Wicked. You will not be disappointed.
You can buy People Are Strange here:
Amazon US
Amazon UK
Book Synopsis:
You can buy People Are Strange here:
Amazon US
Amazon UK
Book Synopsis:
Stories that are sometimes darkly humorous and often spine-chilling written by the author of Midnight Rain, The Wicked, Ugly As Sin and Animosity.
James Newman
is the author of a diverse selection of horror and suspense tales, dark fiction
told with a distinct Southern voice and more often than not with a hint of
pitch-black humor. His published novels include MIDNIGHT RAIN, THE WICKED,
ANIMOSITY, and UGLY AS SIN. When he's not writing, he enjoys watching horror
movies (and showing off what he knows about the genre with the recent release
of his first NONfiction book: 666 HAIR-RAISING HORROR MOVIE TRIVIA QUESTIONS),
listening to loud rock n' roll, and even dabbling in some stage-acting every
now and then.
In real
life, James lives in the mountains of North Carolina with his wife and their
two sons.
And for more about James, visit his site or find him on social media:
Website - Facebook - Twitter - Goodreads - Amazon Page
And for more about James, visit his site or find him on social media:
Website - Facebook - Twitter - Goodreads - Amazon Page
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